Herding Cats

I revisited a funny commercial today that I originally viewed two years ago titled Herding Cats. Watch it to get where I'm heading. Cowboys are so manly, so strong, so able. They manipulate a gun like a surgeon masterfully maneuvers her knife. They are stone-faced in the midst of battle. They are skilled and seemingly unbendable. Yet, give them 10,000 cats to herd across the desert and they would shed tears of frustration seconds into the journey. Rugged, able men brought to tears by little creatures with brains a fraction the size of theirs. Cats are a funny sort. With minds of their own, and a jitteryness to match, they are quite unpredictable. At one moment, they seem to need their owner as much as coffee needs a cup. Yet, in other moments they appear to want attention as much as a hermit wants to attend a social function. Warm, purring critters turn to cold, aloof specimens. For most of us this is not much unlike our kids. We are the cowboys and cowgirls with one or two or ten cats to herd. We can appear so strong, so able, so unfazed by parenthood; yet, our cats (children, that is) somehow pile drive us into the ground with their emotional, relational and sometimes spiritual immaturity, leaving us crying "uncle." At other times, though, their charming beauty, warmness and thoughtfulness forcefully reminds us that Christ's presence, as Psalm 139:5 whispers, is everywhere around us and our families.

Ah, the bitter sweetness of raising our children. It's not unlike a Facebook conversation that I had with a student last night. She bemoaned the fact that she was having a I-just-finished-a-great-book-but-don't-have-another-one-to-read blues. In her life, as in mine, and maybe yours, there is nothing more exciting than being in the middle of thought-provoking novel, but nothing more depressing than being finished. Post-excitement blues. It happens to pastors after they preach. To athletes after  a game. To workers after a hard day's work. To parents after a moment when their children finish being warm and thoughtful and become cold and fiercely independent. In those moments, as parents, we wonder when the next moment of charm and beauty will occur. We wait, wondering when it will happen. And sometimes we wait and wait and wait while our internal organs ulcerate and minds stress. But, here's the rub my fellow cowboys and cowgirls. Waiting for the next glory moment with our child isn't the point of parenting. Training them to know, love and serve Jesus is the point of parenting. Yup, you've heard it right here, parenting = discipleship. Here's the other rub: if we will open ourselves to God in our parenting, he will parent US to know, love and serve him more deeply. Sounds so spiritual, and it is, but is it practical? I think so.

How Do We Make This A Reality?

1. Remind yourself and accept daily that God is in the process of completing a good work in you. He is using our kids as part of this process to complete a good work in both them and us. The journey is the point, not just the high points.

2. When appropriate, tell your children in the moment and afterwards how you see/saw God working in and/or through them.

3. Stay connected to community in order to process the highs and lows of parenting. This gives stability.

4. Most importantly, spend time in God's presence, both alone and with your children. Don't forget to use disciplezone.com through the week with your kids, if they're in grades 1-6, or the take home papers if they are younger.

Herding cats is not always fun, but it can have it's good moments. Just remember: parenting is about the journey of being formed into God's image. Enjoy being with him. Enjoy the process of becoming like him. It's the greatest journey we can travel on!